Getting Your Ass Off The Couch

Exercise is my love and greatest passion in life so I don’t struggle to get to the gym (or wherever I’m choosing to workout, maybe barre at the kitchen counter) …..


It’s cold out there. It’s cold inside. It makes me sleepy. I want more than anything to curl up in a blanket & just watch something. That new Absentia show.

No, I’m not a binger of food but I can binge watch on a show.

So I get the heat up a bit in the gym…..and I go. Anyway.

If you’re having a LAZY DAY that you just CAN’T push through NO MATTER WHAT, what could you do??

  1. Watch what you put in your mouth. This is not the day to eat wrong things!!
  2. Do something. Ab work? On the couch? Under a blankie? B/c you never know….it might even move you to do more…. ALSO, no one regrets exercise. You feel productive. So try to do SOMETHING 🙂
  3. Re-do your workout music. On your iPod. No, I mean it. This will get you excited about future workouts. Perhaps sooner than you thought. Like that day on the couch.
  4. Have a plan. I plan out what I do for myself by the week. So a week ahead. I’m a very disciplined person and I don’t allow myself excuses so what’s written: that’s the law. I also keep workouts for myself on index cards & I mark the calendar with a corresponding letter on the card. You can do MORE but you can’t do less. Don’t leave a day to come out with “whatever.” No plan is a plan to fail.
  5. Don’t allow yourself too many excuses. Like you get 2 cheats maximum a month of exercise cheats where you lie on your couch instead of working out.
  6. Plan cheat days. For food. If you’re feeling sluggish, a cheat day could be calling you.
  7. People say don’t reward yourself with food because you’re not a dog. Screw them. Maybe it’s because I have anorexia but if I eat something awesome, I’m proud. Just choose something awesome. And work out to “earn it”. You need to figure out what works for YOU. This might not be a good option for you.
  8. After a warmup, get in some stretching. It’s cortisol-reducing and is helpful in reducing injury. Another way that you can say that you did something!






Better Your Ass

Can you really? It’s just a muscle. So yes, you fucking can. Say good-bye to your saggy behind.

Here we go:

Start out by———–>

  1. Bent Over Single Leg Raises
  2. Donkey Kicks

*****You STAY on the SAME LEG for both #1 & #2 THEN:

1 min Jump Squats.

*****Perform #1 & #2 for your other leg.

-and then-

1 min Jump Squats


3) Sumo squats (LOADED is BEST)


1 min Jump Squats

Add this butt workout to another workout.

******Try not to rest!

Mini HIIT or Warmup

This here can be used as a mini HIIT session…as a beginner-beginner (Get through it once, for starters)…I’ll suggest modifications. For police academy, going for your police fitness testing, this could be a good warm up. Yeah, I know—> tough!

So “Sets” #1-4 start the same:

Pushups: 20

Crunches (I do mine on a balance trainer): 50

Pullups: 5

Set #5 goes this way:

No pushups—>Instead—>1 minute wall-sit

50 crunches

Round-the-worlds (So these are holding a plate, 10 pounds is good if you’re able to do that much, then without elbows locked but straight—> make biggish circles in front of you, going 1 way for half the time then the other).

Obviously, you go in order from #1-5. After the first part listed above, this follows each:

  1. 1-minute bicep curls (I liked using a bar for this instead of DB’s. Your load will be way lower than your usual but shouldn’t be EASY, k?) —-> Follow with 2-minutes of stair running (Walk down, that’s your “rest).
  2. 1-minute triceps (Same directions as above—>any style, overhead etc)—> Follow with 2 minutes of HIP THRUSTS=Using SANDBAG or a HEAVY DB or kettle—> at least 20 pounds, both hands hold it, one over the other, don’t lock elbows, bring between legs on squat, pass bag kinda between legs, squeeze butt on up, thrusting pelvis out.
  3. 1-minute bent-over rows—>2 minutes high knees (I did trampoline 🙂
  4. Loaded arm circles (OR lateral raises OR front raises if you want instead)–>you know what these are, arm circles at your sides—>big circles baby ones—> but load them, like a 5-pound DB. If new to these & as a beginner, use less, you’d feel 2 pounds!–> Follow with 2 minutes of JJ’s.

    The 5th Set is different….. Instead of push-ups, you will do the Wall Sit then 50 more crunches—–>And the Round-the-worlds – THEN a military press with bar or DB’s (same, keep weight lower than your usual but make sure it isn’t easy)—>

Your last move for this will be 2 minutes more of stair running!


You can half everything? 10 pushups? 25 crunches? 1 pullup?

Use a light weight on the strength parts.

1 minute for the cardio sections?

Get once through.

Everyone starts somewhere! It’s good!!

Weight Loss Tips

This is what I tell clients. Some argue with me over the diet soda….. They don’t have biochemistry degrees so I don’t see how they even have an argument. I’m sorry if this sounds harsh but I do have a biochem degree so let’s have some respect (& a little fear when warranted) for chemicals. Let’s consider what they are, routes they’ll take in your body and their effects.

This isn’t a detailed blog. Any questions about anything, I will try my best to explain, just comment below or email 🙂

#1—>Don’t drink soda at all. Diet soda is WORSE.

I don’t know what to tell you…. I effortlessly stay thin. I mean, I work out, don’t get me wrong but to maintain weight I need MAJOR calories (this says something). I don’t drink any soda whatsoever.

DIET soda makes you FAT.

#2—-> Limit your sugar.

Carb sources such as veggies & fruit are fine. Some honey.

#3—> No preservatives, no HFCS. EAT CLEAN—>Your body doesn’t know what to do with this shit. HFCS is addictive & stores as fat.

#4—->Don’t eat out. COOK at home.

#5—–>Drink loads of water.

“I hate water.” Put REAL lemon in it then. Geez, everything doesn’t have to be flavored or carbonated. If you can’t develop the discipline to drink water…. then…. 😦

#6—->Green tea.


Try taking them.


You might need these too.

#9 Don’t lie to yourself. Or to your trainer.

You didn’t get up to 300+ pounds living on salads. Yet, people tell me this. If you truly want to lose weight and get healthy, you need to BE honest. Not TRY to be honest. DO it.

Why? You need to change the patterns that got you where you are. I had to do the same thing. Even if most thought I had a very good reason (c-spine fracture) for being overweight (what was overweight for me). You figure it out. You become conscious in it. You forgive yourself…. But you learn.

Your trainer is on your side. If you truly want to lose weight, you need to speak honestly about your habits. Your trainer should be trim and fit. If they are, they might just know something.

WOD: AMRAP for 20 minutes!

No rests.

10 1/2 Burpees

10 push-ups

25 crunches (V-sit style)

20 jump squats

40-second planks (each time do a different one)

After planking:

1st round: bicep curls

2nd round: shoulder presses

3rd round: tricep kickbacks

4th round: overhead tricep extensions (using both hands of DB)

(You’ll do more than 4 rounds in 20 minutes—->so start at #1 in this list & go through it again! 🙂

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